Hoping, wishing, praying....maybe?

Those of us who suffer from "secondary infertility" - or any sort of infertility know how heartbreaking that can be. From the time Beebe's letter arrived throughout the 2 years of court proceedings, I easily conceived, but lost three pregnancies very early on, one on Christmas 2006. Although this is completely anecdotal, I personally know and have heard via email from many many rape survivors who have trouble conceiving or a history of miscarriage. I wonder if there is a link. Personally, I suffer from endometriosis and was given a choice by my doctor 5 years ago, "Liz, you can try to get pregnant, or have the surgery." Luckily, the former happened almost immediately. The problem with endo is that the scar tissue can grow back more aggressively after you give birth, so that may be the issue with me. Or, the stress thing. Part of me is glad my unborn child was not exposed to Beebe or my anxiety in the courtroom.

I was laughing the other day, because Halle Berry (who is my age) was talking about her geriatric pregnancy. I believe Nicole Kidman is the same age as well. My thought is, if you're in good shape and good health and try not to stress, it will be just fine, regardless of your age.

I'm just saying - I can smell someone cooking bacon about 2 miles away (that's the good part - the dirty gym clothes in the bin from the husband, not so much) and I am starting to crave grapefruit, iced tea with lemon and hearts of palm. This is a feeling I know. Maybe we'll be lucky this time.